The fire breathing rebels
Arrive at the party early
Their khakis are hung in the closet near the furAsking handouts from the ladies
While they criticize the lord
Boasting of the murder
Of the very hands that pour
And the victims learn to giggle
For at least they are not boredAnd my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tune my pianoThe hostess, is enormous
She fills the room with perfume
She meets the guests and smothers them with greeting
And she asks how are you
And she offers them a drink
The countess of the social grace
Who never seems to blink
And she promises to talk to you
If you promise not to thinkAnd my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tune my pianoThe beauty of the hour
Is blazing in the present
She surrounds herself with those who would surrenderFloating in her flattery
She's a trophy prize caressed
Protected by a pretty face
Sometimes cursed, sometimes blessed
And she's staring down their desire
While they're staring down her dress
And my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tune my pianoThe ego shine like light bulbs
So bright you cannot see them
Blind each other, blinder than a sandboxOh, the fury of an argument
Holding back their yawn
Challenge shakes the chandelier
The selfish swords are drawn
To the loser go the hangups
To the victor go the hangers onAnd my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tuned my pianoThey travel to the table
The host is served for supper
And they pass each other down for salt and pepperAnd the conversation sparkles as their wits are dipped in wine
Dinosaurs on a diet
On each other they will dine
Then they pick their teeth and they squelch a belch saying
"Darling, you tasted divine"And my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tuned my pianoThe wallflower is waiting
She hides behind composure
She'd love to dance
And prays that no one asks herThen she steals a glance at lovers
While her fingers tease her hair
She marvels at the confidence
Of those who hide their fears
Then her eyes are closed as she rides away with a foreign legionnaireAnd my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tuned my pianoRomeo is reeling
Counting notches on his thighbone
Searching for one hundred and elevenAnd he's charming as a child
As he leads you to his web
Seducing queens and gypsy girls
In the boudoir of his head
Then he wraps himself with a tablecloth and pretends he is a bedAnd my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tuned my pianoOh, the party must be over
Even the losers are leaving
But just one doubt is nagging at my caustic mind
So I snuck up close behind me
And I gave myself a kiss
And I led myself to the mirror
To expose what I had missed
There I saw a laughing maniac who was writing songs like thisAnd my shoulders had to shrug
As I crawled beneath the rug and re-tuned my piano